Saturday, May 13, 2006
On Saturday, i was forced by Those In Authority to go for a disagreeable concert. Although the overall performance was rather boring, there were some interesing people about. During the opening, two old ladies were being themselves and popping up all over the place and changing seats over and over again. Then when the thing started, the choir sang around and around and everyone chased each other until I got a headache. There were many unintentional squeaks from the orchestra whoich only consisted of 20 people. The whole thing was rather out of tune and reminded me of something astonishingly familiar. The mezzo soprano was a 'handsome ' lady who reminded me of a prune. her voice however destroyed, or rather betrayed her looks. it was so manly and deep and mellow and goosebumpy. The tenor seemed to be going througha battle of hormones and his voice suddenly cracked twice on the high notes, sounding like a eerie old ghost with rheumatism. The baritone looked like a frowny old man who frowned all the time and looked rather disapprovingly at everyone and everything. i got so bored that i then proceeded to disfigure the programme and transformed, with a pen, the singers into count and countess draculas. After that, I blamed J. S. Bach for writing such horrendously long mass and tried to give him a quadruple chin, gourge out his eyes and give his wig a perm. His picture was conveniently placed on every page so i tried out some fashion designs on him and on of them looked abit like elvis presley. Suddenly the choir went all soft and quiet and I looked up in anticipation of THE END. They unfoetunately paid no attention and started off on a new rendition. Meanwhile, the guy in front of me was a NoseBlower. Actually, there's nothing wrong with noseblowers, just that this one was a Loud NoseBlower. I got quite annoyed with him and proceeded to give him a will-you -please-stop-that glare, which he didn't seem to notice. Anyway, Mr Loud NoseBlower, will you please do us all a favour, and turn it down man. And please, for the good of mankind, will you STOP spreading germs and bacteria to the Almighty, Awesome Queen- there's already plenty to go around, so you can keep your miserable few to yourself. Thank you very much, exclamation mark.
posted @ 11:26 PM
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